live by faith and not by sight

Monday,
Today was a day off for us so we decided to go to waipio valley!
It was really crazy cuz 10 of us were all trying to hitchhike which is pretty impossible.. HAHAH so we walked to the highway and split up in two groups. Hitchhiked twice then this 3rd car could only fit 3 people so I went with Carly and Charis while sungmin and steph had to hitchhike to meet us there.

Charis and I squeezed in the boot an Carly sat in the back row with two other girls. There was a guy driving and another guy in the passenger seat. They also had a black dog jn the car. We kinda got suspicious cuz we didn’t know if they were really going to waipio valley. We stopped at this place with shops cuz they had to buy some stuff at the grocery store KTM so we went to the Korean restaurant to takeaway lunch! When we came back to the car, there was a guy and a girl already inside and when we sat inside, I inhaled and was overwhelmed with the smell of weed.. I was like OHNOOOO JESUS… But I was whatever as long as they bring us to waipio safely. Three of us looked at each other like ‘oh crap’ and the girl asked if we smoked week and Carly immediately was like YEAH and the girl asked if we wanted to take a hit and Carly thought for a few seconds and said yes…. My jaw dropped… I was so confident we won’t gonna fall for it as its against the rules… I was so in shock I sunk into passivity for the rest of the day everytime Charis and Carly took a hit (Charis followed aft Carly). I wouldn’t say I was tempted but I definitely thank god for giving me the strength to resist the temptation and do the wise thing to refuse smoking pot. The ride there was like an hour and it was so scary especially after my friends started smoking pot (didn’t help as they were playing reggae music) as I couldn’t understand why they would put themselves in an even more vulnerable place when we were in such potential danger. And it made me feel so responsible for them in case anything happened I have to take care of them as they were getting stoned… Charis’ eyes turned bloodshot and she started drifting in and out of sleep. I had to remind her to be alert in case anything could happen… But despite whatever was going on I must thank god for his peace as I still felt so much peace in my heart despite everything and thank you Jesus for protecting us 🙂
The driver was drinking alcohol and Carly was so scared and she asked for my phone so she could type it out to tell me. She typed smth like “am i the only one that is worried that the driver is smoking?” And I told her we all are worried. And there’s nothing we can do but pray. So she stretched out her hand to mine and we prayed quietly. 🙂 we drove into this house and like Carly and Charis and I we stared at each other like WHAT IS GOING ON…. I thought they were gonna bring us into this house and rape us or some shit. I immediately asked where we are and the girl was like oh to just a friends house, he just wanted to say hi to his friend living here. Thank god! Anyway we finally reached waipio valley and omg we drove all the way down the valley, it was so steep it was crazy cuz the driver, Jason was drinking and he kept making jokes like NO HANDS.. WTF SO SCARY OK down the steep slope it was insane. We were all freakin out inside…. They drove to the beach to chill. By the time we reached the beach it was about 230pm? Felt so lost cuz we couldn’t find any of the other people 😦 steph said we were gonna hike to the waterfall by gg through the beach so we waited at the beach for them to maybe pass by but they never came. We decided well just hike to the waterfall as that’s our destination so we might see them there but we didn’t wanna get lost as none of us knew the way and Jason didn’t wanna go with us although he knew the route plus we were afraid we won’t be back by the time the sun sets. So we just chilled at the beach instead.
We didn’t wanna go back with the same group of hippies as they weren’t very reliable (felt really heavy when I was with them) although Justin’s house was just behind the YWAM campus. Carly went up to this truck parked beside our car on the beach and he lives in kona too so he agreed to give us a lift!! Thank you Jesus 🙂 you will indeed provide.
So we got a lift from them, and we left around 6pm. It was really fun cuz we were at the back of a truck! Went back up the steep slope and we kept sliding down it was so funny! And we drove along the horizon as the sun was setting.. SO BEAUTIFUL. saw a full rainbow too. God is so good. It really made me feel so at peace and I could feel his love. The sun set had the most colours I’ve ever seen. It had got to be the most amazing sunset ever. We were really cold though, cuz we were higher up and omg super cold we were almost shivering and cuddled in our towels. But I was so amazed by how wonderful god was I just kept staring and admiring the sky and everything he has created before me. When it turned to night I looked up and could see all the stars I was just so overwhelmed and amazed. I will never forget that moment driving back to kona just watching the sunset and the night sky… Wish Sam could see this too!!! Got back in kona by 8+pm. Everyone was so worried for us they even posted a message on PADTS group to pray for us. So the story is that Daniel and the rest ditched waipio valley and went to makalawena beach and steph and sungmin took another shortcut trail to a smaller waterfall that’s why we didn’t see them. HAHA. ah at least we are all back safe 🙂 came back in time for Olivia’s party and we did some games in the dance studio too. It was a crazy long weekend.

Tuesday,

This week is about Gods divine Pumbline.

So this team under the leadership of christy is in Foundational Counselling Ministry and they are on outreach doing this plumbline programme. A plumbline is used for construction to build buildings as it shows what is straight in order to build a building in an upright manner. So gods plumbline is his ways and his truth and it should be how we want to live life – righteously and straight.

The sides that we tend to swing to in life that isn’t gods plumbline is rejection and rebellion.

Each person from FCM spoke on a topic and shared their testimony. I must say the teachings weren’t as good but I still learnt a few things.

We also learnt different personality profiles
1) Compliant Christian (people pleaser)
2) can’t do it Christian (hopeless case)
3) competitive christian (super achiever)
4) critical christian (rebellious)

We can only overcome these personalities and redeem our different personalities back to its original design by taking up the kingdom personality of love, joy, peace, faith, security, content, acceptance and belonging.

At the end Christy talked about something that really spoke to me which was about keeping our one and only focus on God. that we know our identity and who we are by knowing who God is and making his word personal in our life. Even in relationships, both parties should be stable in our identity in Christ before we get together as then we won’t be together for the wrong reasons ie feeding each others insecurities. Our value and worth should only come from God that we don’t need anyone else to tell us who we are and it will not shake us.

Had finale practise then singing class. Skipped prayer set as I really was interested and also it was em’s last night as she was leaving to Malaysia tmrw. So we went to target/Ross by taxi with Gaby, Daniel and sungmin. Did some shopping woot woot^^ stayed in em’s common room for a while just to talk and say bye etc with fiona/Yoshi/rachel. Then came back to my room and krinkle was along our corridor sheltering himself from the rain. So poor thing. And he kept meowing at me so I let him come into my room and we took care of him for awhile like we have him milk and some chicken as today was so busy I only got to eat my dinner at this time which was like 10/11pm haha.

Wednesday,
we learnt how we can overcome our unbelief due to rejection or pride due to rebellion.
1) redemption
2) revelation
3) repentance
4) release
5) recognise
6) renounce
7) renewal & rebuilding

Ok they seriously won’t thorough about the theory part of plumbline cuz some of them, English is their second language so I have no idea what they were saying lol

After lunch we had finale rehearsal, fan dance and singing. At the briefing before we rehearsed for finale, they told us our new small groups and when i was tols im in daniel and gee ha’s group i just wante to cry. I cant get along with them especially jasmine omg…We had to change our whole fan dance routine as Yoshi was leaving us 😦 also, this week for singing, kenny was in charge of singing just to touch up and tweak some stuff. Kenny confirmed the solo singers after audition yesterday night and he chose lexi and gee ha. Honestly i was really disappointed… After singing I saw and Gaby and Charis just sitting around in class and after much prayer yesterday I was gonna talk to Charis and Carly today. But there was no opportunity until now. So I say with them and chat then I just started talking to Charis about what happened on Monday. And she Carly came in suddenly and It was such good timing so I talked to her too. But I felt like they weren’t convicted enough. And on top of that, I felt like Rachel was attacking me when I wa trying to tell Charis that repenting to god is not enough as we have to be accountable to like a leader so that it will not happen again. And Rachel was like questioning every single detail of why do this why do that and it really hit me as so many things happened today. But I knew I did my part to talk to them. The truth will be revealed at the end of the day. I quickly went back to my room and broke down on my bed. I just started crying because I guess I was overwhelmed by the 3 things that happened today. And when i was done crying my heart out(which helped me feel better), I felt like I should take a shower and just talk to god as I really needed his comforting. And he did just that. He comforted me and encouraged me. He told me that i should tell lexi tmrw abt what happened on Monday and that I have to trust his plan for me. And be happy for the soloists. Also the small group is like a challenge to test me and to learn to understand and love the ones that are hard to understand/love. I felt so much peace after my shower and I chose to really put my trust in him 🙂

Thursday,
Today and tomorrow is ministry time. So I was actually supposed to be in another group but I asked lexi to put me somewhere else as I couldn’t trust the people in that group HAHA.
So Christa went first, it was kinda awkward as idk why we all had to be in the room to listen I think just to support and tell her what god puts in our hearts for her. Anyway I was next and when we started, there was two counsellors and both were Koreans. But the guy was more talkative than the girl so he led. And he told me god is happy/pleased w me and that was such an encouragement 🙂 then I talked about how god revealed to me my rship w my mom etc… The lady also told me I will be getting more revelations from him and he wants to spend much more time with me. I felt that way too as I feel like I don’t have enough time with him as I’m so busy and there’s so much to do in a day that I have to sleep! Can’t even blog omgg. God also brought up like the root cause of how I got this manipulating spirit in me. He also told me that he will guide me when I return home and I shouldn’t be afraid to go back and have to face my parents cuz I just have to express Gods love through me and I won’t be doing it alone 🙂 at the end, the guy told me that god is excited for what he was planned for my life/future and he will guide me through. Amen! Felt so happy and encouraged. Because we ended early, we had an early lunch. Mirjam felt like I had a lot of emotions in me and she felt like she had to talk to me. So we talked after lunch in the common room and she made coffee for me too! I told her about my breakdown last night but I’m ok now and we just shared about what we were going through and the spiritual warfare going on now. It’s crazy. So we prayed for the school and the people and for me I really felt so happy and free. Miriam’s an amazing girl 🙂 she said smth that really spoke to me that like thinking too much and not sharing it can really be very destructive to a person. I felt that’s me. I think too much and keep all these thoughts in. And it makes me the opposite of free.

After lunch was finale and I also went to the boutique to Jew some stuff. I was one of the ohana court greeters for tonight’s ohana court gathering so we stood at the entrance and welcomed everyone! So fun haha screaming and shouting and we did waves and hi-5s!!
After ohana, we went to macs for supper with Gaby, Fiona, sungmin, Daniel, kyle, kristina and gaeten. Had a yummy supper (20 chicken nuggets) and got to know Kyle who is leading the ships DTS. He’s such an awesome guy!

Friday,
It was counselling again. Miriam and camillas turn! Ended early and had an early lunch too ^^ had finale rehearsal then fan dance. Tried to blog abit/pack my area and pack for honolulu trip! It was super rush as right after fan dance I had to pack and get dinner and leave. Our 7pm flight was delayed till like 9? We were there so early! HAHA checked in safely and got through security without them stopping me because I forgot to give my full name when booking my flight so my boarding pass was only “Estelle Chiu” and they could charge me to change my boarding pass if they were being anal. Thank god they didn’t ask 🙂 when we were waiting at the gate ready to board, I really felt this heaviness and I told everyone that we should really pray for this trip because there’s so much spiritual warfare going on. We have to ask for Gods protection and strength.
Reached honolulu airport at like 940ish? Found the shuttle to the car rental place to collect our cars. But we had so much issues with renting the at as the guy working there was some con man and whatever they said on the phone to Stephanie was totally different from what he told us and we had to pay double the price, 400 bucks for 2 days rental wth?? Spent more than an hour there also trying to find someone who can drive and has a credit card to pay. Alexandra was our only option. So like by 10/11 we got the car and everyone was super angry at the conman he really sucked money out of us and we couldn’t do anything about it. Alexandra was also super nervous to drive as she drove manual but this was auto and the car in Europe is slightly different from the ones here. Like the gear. So we had to be quiet and lexi had to direct her etc to our hotel with google maps. So the atmosphere was super intense! We got lost and kept circling downtown as it was a one way road and also the hotel was so hidden! Finally found it and had to find a parking space which wasn’t easy either. Then we had to worry about sneaking into the hotel as 7 of us were squeezing in one room. That wasn’t much if a problem as the reception closed at 10pm. Settled down in the room and we were all hungry and Charis also wanted to meet her jap friends so we went to Denny’s for supper. Got to see Fridays night life which was pretty crazy. There was a club right beside our hotel LOL super noisy ! And the streets were full of partygoers while we were innocently going to eat supper HAHA. Came back by 1+ and everyone crashed. So fortunate that I could sleep on the bed w Charis and kaori while the rest slept on the couches.

Saturday morning we all woke super late like almost 9am and we took our time to get breakfast. Some had subway but I went to Starbucks as I needed wifi too hehe got coffee and a yummy bagel. Then we headed to visit the beaches along the north shores of honolulu. Don’t rly remember the name of the beaches but they’re all on the same coast so I guess there’s not much difference :p drove around for quite some time as we had no GPS and were trying to find the beaches. Went to one beach in the morning and we chilled there. The weather was so bipolar! It will be sunny for 2 minutes then suddenly drizzle and sometimes get heavier and super cold then the rain stops and the sun comes out again. Wth so weird super awkward situation to have at the beach. So some were kinda disappointed couldn’t rly get a full on tan and stuff. And also the hotel suddenly called to tell us that we have to check out at 1pm although we booked it for two nighys so we were all so shocked. And we were like so frustrated and we had to book a room at another hotel for tonight. Then the hotel called back to say they cant take the things out of our hotel room as its illegal although they said they would. And we had to pay extra to extend our check out as we were so far from the hotel. So that really dampened our spirits too. Left at lunch time and decided to find a place to take away lunch on the way to sunset beach but instead we stopped by this area with some food and shops and we ate Thai food!! Yum ^^ it started raining heavily again and then stopped after 10mins. Met some cute kittens in one of the shops. Everyone was rly satisfied with the Thai food as it was super yummy! And we were all laughing and having a good time at lunch. Then before leaving we called the hotel again to check what’s happening as we booked two nights there yet they say we only booked one night and caused so much problem. And the lady realised they made a mistake and found the booking -__- because the website steph booked our room did not send the hotel the booking confirmation. Anyway they apologised and let us come later in the late afternoon to check out without extra fee. So we thanked god for that and went to just visit another beach and we didn’t even stop by sunset beach as it all looked the same! And we dropped by another beach just to take pictures and Camilla realise her lips were swelling and getting itchy , probably an allergy reaction or hives so we all prayed for her. Went back to our hotel after that and checked out and checked into ambassador hotel. We wanted to return the car to the airport as we didn’t wanna pay so much and there were shuttles and buses that can bring us around the island. We had problems as our group would be split as some had to return the car back to the airport and like they would have to take a shuttle back while the rest of us had fun which was unfair for them. Thank god when we were driving around the hotel waiting for steph and Camilla to check in, we found this car rental returns area just around the corner before our hotel!!! So awesome!!! So we were able to return our car there and we only paid 250 and they didn’t charge for fuel either! Thank you Jesus! We had to sneak in again omg into our hotel and then some were really tired like lexi cuz she drove us around the whole day and so they stayed in the hotel and ordered pizza for dinner. While I went out to explore waikiki w steph and Charis. We went shopping woot all the shops close at 11pm!! Then we went for dinner at like 10pm HAHA caught up shopping. Was so hard to shop as I had to borrow money from steph as my mom hasn’t deposited money into my ATM yet. I was a broke ass nigga !!! Kekeke. Aww man I missed the city life! So many tourists everywhere haha. Then we had dinner at jimmy buffets! Super cute beach themed restaurant! Yummy food too 🙂 the alcohol is so cheap so tempting 😦 AFTER DTS!!!!! Woot woot ^__^ then we shopped a bit more and went to crash some hotels just to explore and tried to go to the top of Sheraton hotel but when we reached the top floor there were no windows-__- so we couldn’t see any view except like there was a lounge room with windows and we could see a bit of the city lights cuz it was a glass door. Then we head back to the room and we discussed outside the room what to do tomorrow and had a small argument w steph as she didn’t believe lexi would allow us and she didn’t want us to wake them up n shit… Anyway I was like whatever lets just go in and they were in bed but watching tv and resting. So I asked who wanted to go to diamond head with us cuz well have to wake at 630/7am and go early to maximise our last day. And lexi allowed (duh) as long as we keep in contact and meet them when were back.

So the next day, Sunday, we went to this famous jap restaurant that handmade udon noodles for breakfast! Super yummy!!! Took a bus to diamond head which was like 10/15 mins away. Hiked up in about an hour, wasn’t as bad as we expected it to be! There were so many tourists wth is was like a long queue up to the top HAHAHA too many people. But the view was amazing! Super windy~ catches the bus back by 1030am (we were so surprised it was still so early) and met the rest at the hotel and we headed to waikiki beach! Woot^^ it was soooo crowded!!! So many tourists the whole beach was so packed man! So different compared to the beaches here in kona. But it was nice seeing so much activity going on. There was even a boat at shore haha. Went into the water and played in the waves then steph and I went to one of the hotel infinity pools which overlooked the ocean!! so beautiful i love that kind of thing :’) so amazing! and they had beanbags that was in the water so you can sit on the beanbag and chill while floating in da pool. So awesome! So we stayed there till 1-ish. Then we left lexi and Alexandra to go shopping! Decided to skip lunch and meet them for early dinner at 5pm at hard rock cafe as we had to leave early anyway for our flight. Went back to forever21 to shop and we spent like one and a half hours there! HAHA it was fun though then we went to apple as cam had to get a new phone so I got wifi^^ then we kinda split up to shop then met for dinner! During dinner lexi found out that our flight was delayed from 830 to 930 then 930 to 1009pm. So we decided to leave later and maybe stay and shop more. So I went w Charis to brandy and Melville and we walked super far to find yogurtland but it was worth it and super yummy and rushed to buy my Nike running shoes! It’s so pretty i love it so much :):) so we kinda turned up slightly late heh. Took a bus there but realised we will only reach there 930 but our flight is at 1009. So hopped out and took a cab. The can fare to the airport was like 30bux. Lol and because everyone was panicking most of them took the first cab that stopped for us which was a 4 sweater while the cab we got was a 7 sweater that could fit all of us for the same price -__- nvm. Anyway we were talking to the cab driver and I tried telling him about Jesus subtly haha. He told us the struggles of his job and the dangers etc. when we reached, steph came to us and said “the plane left” we were like WTF!!!!! And like omg the service was so bad, the lady working for Mesa airlines was so unhelpful cuz the plane hasn’t left as the flight got delayed till 11pm. The lady just kept saying its too late and it was hard to get a hold of those working behind the desk as there was a flight to Maui that was cancelled so there were quite a few angry customers already. And so they had other things to solve. The security was closing which meant it would be impossible for us to get to the gate as the securities are closed. When we finally got them, the lady said we have to arrive two hours before the original stated time in order to get our boarding pass. -__- who said that. Rubbish…so they said we are too late and the gate is closed but wtf we arrived at 9pm and the plane only leaves in two hours! And the lady said she can’t find all our names on the list as our names for deleted ? Huh?? Talking rubbish.. Anyway it was pretty intense and we were actually argueing with them. Steph was panicking as usual. She snapped at lexi and me. The supervisor was super unprofessional looking like a hobo so we were like this is hopeless. And we’ll have to find a hotel and stay one more night. We went to the international airport so see if we would find a place to sleep but no.. We found a phone that could call out to hotels so we asked for the prices and stuff and realised we should just go back to ambassador hotel. So we took a bus back and while waiting for the bus to come, we just talked about this weekend and reflected and I liked how optimistic everyone was. Some of us actually had a feeling we would miss our flight or smth HAHA but yeah because we could not call tmrw to rebook our flight, we were still worried about how much it would cost us. Fell asleep on the bus and it turned midnight and everyone wished kaori happy birthday!!! Then we snuck back into the hotel and stayed one more night. Kaori booked a room for herself cuz she wanted her own bed. So Charis and I stayed with her. We came back like 1+and crashed.

The next morning lexi called our room to tell us we got a flight at 450pm and we only have to pay 4 bucks more woot thank you jesus!!!! we slept in and met to check out at 10am.

Some got coffee bean for breakfast so they went to the beach first while charis, kaori, alexandra and i wanted to try this popular breakfast place called EGGS N THINGS. But we had to wait 30mins so we walked to KIMO BEAN which was like a popular coffee place too, to try some coffee! I tried the mocha koko which was so good! Then we got our table and I ordered crepes. Super yummy and our waiter, ken, was the best. He was so sociable and friendly and asked us to write down some words he could say in the different languages we spoke. And he showed us his collection of customers and the list of words they wrote for him to learn. By the time we finished eating, the rest just left the beach as it was like noon already and they were hungry but we weren’t as we had brunch. So we went shopping while the rest went to get smth to eat and shop too. Then we met at the bus stop at 2pm to head to the airport. Saw the same bitchy people that gave us the worst sevice ever and we truly ignored them. Cam wanted to thank them for their bad service cuz we got an extra day for such a cheap price cuz of their bad service :p the plane was delayed as usual by more than an hour~ reached back with jake greeting us and we took a cab to macs to eat dinner at 630pm as we just missed dinner. We were talking and reflecting on our crazy weekend getaway and just laughing and also discussing how we shouldnt look to happy LOL then we walked back to campus for kaori’s birthday party in the classroom that they decided to have for her. Everyone was so happy to have us back and I was happy to be back too 🙂 unpacked and did laundry then packed my stuff. Was a crazy weekend getaway indeed 🙂 learnt so much.
Wrote a short reflection that night on the fb group 🙂



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